Monthly Archives: April 2015

I’ve let go of purpose:

living, dying, dreaming.

My ego can no longer

sort out my unconscious

and barely knows

what my heart wants. But,

I think that in dreams

where I’m falling, it must

be death. And if he’s there—

I dream that the man

I used to love is falling, but

I haven’t pushed him.

The television flickers beneath

my eyelids when I wake: blue

static flashes, and laughter

buzzes like flies. Every time

he falls, it jars me just as

I’m jumping after him. I turn

off the tv, then silence—

an awful feeling like cleaning out

mouse traps in the morning.

The standing lamp in my

living room gets long or short—

depending on the sun’s

position. (I’m certain) And,

all day, I’m crouched behind

couches under tables. And,

I’m telling that silly lamp that I’ve

no persistence for keeping up

with the mice on the floor, or their

shadows. (I’m lying.) I’m trying to pick

them all up and throw them away

without gagging. I tell him I

ingest seventy-eight of someone else’s

truths and ninety fluid ounces

of Coke in a day. That my dad says

the government put something in it,

to fatten us up, our apple-mouths.

As I drop another shadow-mouse

in the trash, I tell the lamp

it’s no matter:

Though, when people

tell stories, I blink at the wall.

I heard love songs once,

guitar strings in my ribs. Until,

I listened from outside

and heard a joke. I turned off

the music and saw a spectacle—my face,

in the mirror, all quivering—Picasso.

(That look has since settled). When

I clean out the mouse traps,

I tell the lamp. Or I used to—until

I felt like he wasn’t

listening anymore, and

I turned him off. But I always

turn everything off.

Here is a link to an article I am mentioned in for the Southeast Examiner!  You can’t really see it, but the poetry-pottery box also contains some of my poetry.

Fall Down Alice

***

The rabbit with pink eyes is

calling you now, away from the dingy

ol’ gutter, the crowd, from the ticking,

the chores and the grayer of things,

from your dimes and your diamonds, from

have to’s and needings, to wander

a night, into something so dark

and so deep you might think

you don’t know where you are… did you

drive? No, you followed the rabbit and

fell, where he went with his pocket-watch

I’ll never tell…

Down, down, down, you will go…

It’s a dream and a show!

Come now, take a sly bite or a small

little sip, eat me, drink me, you shrink,

you grow gorgeously big.  Let’s all

run in a circle, and eat tiny cakes

hear the music and see all the flowers

and shapes, let our story take over,

as you take your tea and the mad hatter’s

riddle echoes in our frenzy. We dance

til the queen stands up with her face

red and she turns to us all and says

“OFF WITH THEIR HEADS!”

Let’s sing “Beautiful Soup” and

play games with the gryphon

surrounded by creatures incredibly

vivid, with big eyes and ears and

with smiles so wide you’ll see

galaxies in them and tumble inside.

Play a game of croquet with the king

of the hearts, you can play with the

queen, but you can’t steal her tarts.

Let us smoke with the blue caterpillar

and dance with our limbs changing

size in kaleidoscope trance. Take

a stroll through our garden, our

Refuge, and see what a whimsical

wonderland Portland can be…

Oh the Cheshire cat’s King-unsettling grin

will expand and contort in the radiant din,

a transfiguring smile makes pleasures unreal,

unless you can recapture your power and

kneel to the creatures unknown and

the mystical presence. And watch Alice, fall down

with the wide eyes of innocence

into the rabbit hole, sealing her youth

 come fall down with our rabbit, discover your truth.

The stamp, created by Dan Peccia

Prototype

Prototype with date

Prototype

Group of Prototypes

The coasters drying before going in the kiln

First coat of glazes on final product

Final product

The Mad Hatter Tea Party

The Mad Hatter Tea Party

The Mad Hatter Tea Party (Photo by Timothy Wildgoose)

The Mad Hatter Tea Party Coasters (Photo by Timothy Wildgoose)

The Mad Hatter Tea Party (Photo by Timothy Wildgoose)

The Mad Hatter Tea Party

The Mad Hatter Tea Party

Pouring Tea (Photo by Timothy Wildgoose)

Performer

Stilt Man

Me!

Down the Rabbit Hole, hosted at Refuge by Living Prism Productions, and created by my friend Dar Sernoff was an incredible night of musicians, dj’s, performers, dancers, jugglers, and artists, all working around an Alice and Wonderland theme.  I could not have been more pleased with how it turned out.  Around a thousand people attended, I went with a great friend from PCSL, who had never been to a Living Prism event before (all of which are incredible) and I danced for hours upon hours.

It was also a big step for me creatively, as I wrote a poem to honor the theme and also collaborated with my friend Dan Peccia to contribute some coaster pottery to the Mad Hatter’s Tea Party at the event.  The pottery project as well as the poem were new territory for me, as I had never endeavored toward either such thing before with the intention of creating something for a specific event, purpose, and theme completely outside of my own body of work.  It was a ton of fun and a huge opportunity for creative growth. This poem was inspired by Lewis Carroll’s Adventures in Wonderland/Through the Looking Glass. The photos are of the pottery and event. Cheers!